The Last: A reflection on 10 months in Germany








Just got back from a long, sweaty, wonderful summer day of "Abbi" festivities. Abbi is the rigorous test that German prep school students have to pass in order to even THINK about applying to college. 6 hours long in each subject, the Abbi covers every school topic in extreme depth, its material spanning all the way back to 9th grade. Makes the SAT look like a picnic side dish.

Anyway, my hostbrother Thor passed his Abbi with flying colors, and therefore I was able to experience a real life Abbi diploma ceremony, as well as an Abbi Ball! It's all basically the same as an American graduation and prom, just more honest. The principle had no trouble announcing that the class of 2015 was an annoying bunch, yet despite his low expectations, did pretty well. "Pretty well" as in the best grade average the school has experienced in years, but let's not get too excited, ok? Everyone calm down.

In other words, It was a perfect way to end my exchange year in Germany, given the fact that I didn't have much time to think deeply and freak out. But it's 3:00 in the morning now, so let the flippin out begin! I'm going to be very German about this. Bushes, forget being beaten around.

At the beginning of an exchange year, you willingly transform into an infant.  


Red, wriggly, and wide eyed, you plop out into a life you don't know how to be a part of yet. Luckily, there is a family who is willing to take you in, for no particular reason other than pure goodness. Your "pitiful and cute as a button" thing helps too. But these lovely people are rambling mish mash, and doing things in a funny way, and the amount you don't know scares you deeply.The only way you can get through it all is to hone in on your natural gift for charades, nod your head, and listen. 

But that takes you far for a helpless little baby. You start to find your way to the bathrooms at school. You start to ride your bike without killing things.You start to feel language from its roots, and the people it has run through. Each day, even though it can sting a little, you can't help but become.

Finding the bathroom becomes finding a friend. Riding your bike becomes riding to big, grand cities. Hearing the words becomes spouting out your own sentences, broken but mended with a new flair of confidence you can't shake off. Despite this confidence, you continue to be humbled by how much you have yet to learn about this place you've learned to call home. But the difference is, what you don't know excites you this time around.

I leave tomorrow, still not knowing a universe of things. But I know there are people here who have shaped 10 simple blocks of time into a beautiful mess of knowledge, love, and awareness. I know laughing at yourself and your failures is a fun way to move forward. And I know that this year in Germany has set me on the path I want to follow till I'm pushing up daisies: a full-time learner, a passionate observer, and a part-time currywurst connoisseur.

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